Essay

" A lot of people don't realize that depression is an illness. I don't wish it on anyone, but if they would know how it feels, I swear they would think twice before they just shrug it." (Jonathan Davis) This statement is held closely to my heart. Depression is the worst feeling anyone can ever have encroach on them.

Depression affects about 19 million people in the USA every year. It usually strikes in your younger adult years. Many factors can contribute to the onset of depression, including the presence of other emotional disorders, stress, poor nutrition, physical illness, personal loss and relationship difficulties. I should know.

During my younger years, Lauren, my wife, was killed in the 9/11 World Trade Center attack. I was devastated. I still am. I would not eat or sleep, and I was irritable to anyone who came across me. I nearly died myself. I loved her so much. We were high school sweethearts. We both grew up in a little town in Pennsylvania called Shanksville. Although most of you now know that it's also where Flight 93 came crashing down. That was actually in part of my father's land back home. We dated each other for a long time, and eventually I decided I wanted to go to Harvard and become a lawyer. The distance was difficult, but one day I walked into a rival's office and she was answering the phone at a desk. I was so happy to see her. It turns out she had moved to New York to follow me, and she was going to meet up with me that night. I knew she was here. We had dinner plans that night, but i had no clue the extent of her stay. I was so overjoyed and things went well. We were engaged and we had a beautiful wedding back home. Things were finally going as I had planned.

We were married for about two weeks when it happened. I was in my office across town. I saw the plane from my own window. I was on the 100th floor. I could see the building, and I knew it was hers. I sat there for a minute. I didn't know what to do. Once I realized what had happened, I rushed out into the street and I made my way across town. When I got to about three blocks from the building, police were blocking the roads and men and women were crying in the streets. I was there until 2 a.m. the next day. All the while I watched rescue crews go in, and come out with clumps of people. Not one of them was Lauren. I spent many hours looking at my shoes and sitting on the curb. I was lost.

To this day, I am still deeply affected by what happened to Lauren. She was my life. I was so happy and now everyone thinks I am a jerk. I try to be the nice guy I once was, but I just can't seem to get past what had happened. Depession is a major issue in the United States today. It is growing as we speak. You may think there's no way out, but there is. I got help. I went to counceling, and I still strongly communicate with my family as well as Lauren's back home. Things are still tough, but it's getting better. There's still hope. Don't ever forget that.